“When they come on before the show they’re not called reviews, they’re called fortune telling,” declared Seven Sharp presenter Greg Boyed over-optimistically, of the bagging the show was taking from commentators before it even got to air. Others of us were happy to wait and give it a fair go. Miracles can happen and even something with promos that looked like a Pak‘n Save ad as reimagined by a fourth form media studies class might deliver.
As it turns out, the show’s first night was a triumph for fortune tellers, though with an awkwardness well beyond the powers of prediction.
Ali, Greg and Jesse lined up with all the animation and assurance of ducks at a fairground shooting range, intoned some over-scripted gags about Waitangi Day.
Heather Du Plessis-Allan went and put the tough questions to the Prime Minister: “Do you have a red phone?”
John Key cracked a bottle of wine and attempted a very simple toast a very simple show with a very simple name. Even that was doomed. “This is to celebrate the success of Sharp Seven!” he cried.
The show may not tell us much about current affairs but it could have a lot to say about the state of the nation, all of it woeful. An attempt at a serious story sat uncomfortably in the mix.
Still, it’s an ill wind. Breakfast now seems like meaningful adult viewing. And you can all but hear the champagne corks popping over at TV3, as they raise their glasses in a merry toast to Sharp Seven.
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