The universe is actually evil

By David Hill In Inbox

Print Share
8th October, 2011
The essential malevolence of the universe is encapsulated in the way toast hits the floor buttered-side down. I read somewhere that it’s all to do with the distribution of mass and the laws of rotation. Someone with a grant from Nasa has shown that we never drop a piece of toast evenly – and indeed, there’s seldom anything even about my language when it happens. So the slice begins to turn as it descends, and usually has time for only half a rotation before the lipids hit the lino. Apparently, if bench-tops were twice their normal height, the toast would land in the eat-me position. ...

Get full access to Listener.co.nz

Subscribers can read the full version of this story.

You can subscribe and get full online access for as little as $5 per week.

Enjoy the high-quality, in-depth journalism of the Listener magazine with convenient online access. This includes access to thousands of archived articles and up-to-date TV and entertainment listings.

Our great content is available online even before it hits the shelves, and includes more focus on breaking news. With our responsive design you get a great reader experience whether you read from your home computer, tablet, or even smartphone.

Already a subscriber? Just to read full version of this story.

Already an existing print subscriber? As part of your magazine subscription you are entitled to receive full access to the New Zealand Listener Online content. Click here for instructions on how to redeem your digital access.

Or you can subscribe now to get unlimited access to listener.co.nz.

More by David Hill

Switch to our mobile site