SUNDAY FEBRUARY 5
Stephen Fry’s 100 Greatest Gadgets (TV1, 7.30pm). We could listen to Stephen Fry talk about anything so, as he’s a gadget expert, this looks promising. It is, however, mostly a clip show in which various UK celebs talk about the gadget they couldn’t live without. Lawrence Llewelyn-Bowen and his scissors, for instance. Fry’s No 1 is controversial.
2 Broke Girls
All New Simpsons (Four, 7.30pm). The twenty-third – twenty-third! – season of The Simpsons begins with The Falcon and the D’ohman, an episode reminiscent of Viggo Mortensen flick A History of Violence. In his third appearance in the series, Kiefer Sutherland guest-voices as Wayne, a new security guard at the power plant. A new season of Family Guy (Four, 8.00pm) also begins tonight, and Four has new seasons of American Dad, The Cleveland Show and South Park (Thursday, 8.00pm, 8.30pm and 9.30pm) starting this week.
WAITANGI DAY
Nga Taonga Whitiahua (Maori, 2.00pm). Maori Television continues the tradition of all-day Waitangi-related coverage, beginning with this series, which showcases the New Zealand Film Archive’s Te Kohinga Taonga Maori moving image collective. Today’s episode: Waitangi 1934. See our listings for the full day’s line-up.
America’s Next Top Model: All Stars (Four, 7.30pm). Otherwise known as cycle 17 of the poutiest, flakiest, catfightiest, most addictive show on TV. Tyra(nt) Banks rounds up her favourite non-winners from previous seasons for another attempt to out-skinny one another.
Becoming Santa (Arts Channel, Sky 079, 8.30pm). follows long-time showbiz production assistant Jack Sanderson as he spends a Christmas season as Big Red. The charming, family-friendly (though not for children who still believe) doco won an audience choice award at the SXSW Film Festival in 2010. Sanderson, likeable enough to play Father Christmas, also makes for hilarious company as he attends Santa School, learning how to deal with tricky requests such as reuniting separated parents; dyes his hair and beard white; and interviews veteran Santas, many of whom profess an addiction to their seasonal pastime. Might just win over the most diehard of Grinches.
TUESDAY FEBRUARY 7
The Secret Lives of Dancers (TV3, 7.30pm). Behind the scenes at the Royal New Zealand Ballet. This season, the company has recruited American ballet royalty as its new artistic director. Ethan Stiefel is a principal dancer with the American Ballet Theatre, and took up the Wellington position in September last year, for the RNZB’s production of The Sleeping Beauty. Fans of guilty-pleasure ballet movie Center Stage will recognise him from that – fans of Oscar-nominated Black Swan will recognise Spanish dancer Sergio Torrado, whom Stiefel recruits, as Natalie Portman’s partner. For added Hollywood glitz, Weta Workshop contributed special effects for The Sleeping Beauty, which Listener critic Francesca Horsley praised: “The artistry and vigour of the whole company is evident throughout the production, capturing the extravagance of the original masterpiece.”
Missing Pieces (TV3, 8.00pm). A fourth season of this family-reunion show sees producer David Lomas going as far afield as Crete, Dubai and Ecuador to track down Kiwis’ long-lost rellies.
New Girl (Four, 8.00pm). This all depends on your tolerance for Zooey Deschanel, usually found playing what US film critic Nathan Rabin called the “manic pixie dream girl” in films such as 500 Days of Summer and Yes Man. Here she plays Jess, who has just been dumped, and who moves in with three self-obsessed guys. Damon Wayans jnr appears in the first episode as one of said guys but, disappointingly, is out after that, as he got a role in Happy Endings. Max Greenfield (Ugly Betty, Veronica Mars) will do as alternative eye-candy. New Girl recalls more old-fashioned sitcoms such as Marlo Thomas’s That Girl, largely cynicism-free and sweetly charming – unless you find that sort of thing sickly.
Immigration Nation (Maori, 8.30pm). A history of Australia’s attempts at social engineering, Immigration Nation, is an ambitious production by Aussie public broadcaster SBS. The three-part documentary series is accompanied by online material from historic newspaper articles to present-day interviews with the ancestors of early immigrants. The series screened over the Tasman last year, not long after more than 50 asylum-seekers drowned when their boat foundered on the rocks around Christmas Island. It was a reminder of the country’s fraught history with “outsiders”; “great, free and white” is not such a distant memory. The first episode covers the far-reaching effects of the White Australia policy, which sought not only to keep non-European immigrants out, but also to get rid of any Asians or Pacific Islanders already there – never mind that they may have been there for generations, or that many were brought to Australia under duress in the first place. This not only broke up families at the time, but deprived Australia of financial and cultural stimulus from its nearest neighbours. The storytelling in this series was praised for its documentary accuracy, but also for its structure: this is no dry chronology of Australia’s past 100 years.
Project Runway (TV3, 9.30pm). Returns for its ninth season – included among the guest judges this time is Kim Kardashian. Super.
Misfits (Four, 9.30pm). The crew have finished their community service as they head into season three of the Asbo-superhero drama, but they’ll stay in the orange jumpsuits, which have become their de-facto crime-fighting costumes. The twist this season? New powers.
Go Girls: Amy’s Diary (TV2, 10.00pm). North Shore drama Go Girls is back, and picks up a year after it left off. This special fills in some of those gaps, including the arrival of Britta’s baby, Dad TBA.
WEDNESDAY FEBRUARY 8
All New Two and a Half Men (TV2, 7.30pm). In which Ashton Kutcher arrives to replace Charlie Sheen after he self-destructed last year. For diehard fans, the final five of Sheen’s episodes are screening back-to-back on Tuesday night (TV2, 7.30pm).
2 Broke Girls (TV2, 8.00pm). US stand-up comedian Whitney Cummings struck TV gold when two of her sitcoms were chosen for development – an almost unheard-of feat. Her first, Whitney, in which she stars, has not fared as well as 2 Broke Girls, which she co-created with Sex and the City’s Michael Patrick King. King’s pedigree would be near flawless if he hadn’t also made the second, appalling, SATC movie, but never mind. Here, Kat Dennings (ER) and relative newcomer Beth Behrs star as Max and Caroline, the titular skint ladies who are co-workers at a greasy spoon. Max grew up on the wrong side of the tracks, and Caroline has been forced to take a job after her father pulled a Bernie Madoff. They quickly move in together and hit on a plan to reverse their fortunes. When they’re on screen together, this is snappy stuff – sharp, just outrageous enough for the time-slot and more frequently funny than not, even if the sex jokes are too easy. This is from the same stable as Two and a Half Men, after all. On the downside, the cafe’s Korean proprietor (Matthew Moy, Scrubs) really needn’t be such a stereotype in 2012. Along with The New Girl (Tuesday), this was called one of the best new comedies last year by US critics: it’s about time we had an injection of funny women.
The Big Bang Theory (TV2, 8.30pm). Penny and Raj shagged: it’s all hilariously downhill from there.
The Walking Dead (TV2, 9.00pm). Bless TV2 for allowing only the tiniest of gaps between seasons of the zombie-apocalypse drama. Season two begins as the survivors decide to flee Atlanta and head for the countryside. Show-runner Frank Darabont left the series suddenly last year, amid rumours of tensions between him and studio AMC, and that he’d fired the entire writing staff. None of these was ever confirmed, and fears that the show’s quality would suffer were unfounded. The ratings broke records in the US when this season began late last year, and AMC booked a third season.
THURSDAY FEBRUARY 9
Once Upon a Time (TV2, 8.30pm). In a land far, far away (Maine), there’s a town stuffed to the gills with outcasts from the magic kingdom. Not Disney, though this light fantasy is reminiscent of those old family shows, but with a bigger budget and from the brains behind Lost, who are everywhere these days. Emma Swan (Jennifer Morrison, House) is a bail bondswoman, so far unaware that she’s actually the first-born child of Snow White and Prince Charming, who have alter egos in her hometown. High concept, but whacky fun.
Bones (TV3, 8.30pm). Our favourite of the myriad forensic-science crime procedurals, thanks to its refusal to glamorise or sex up murder, not to mention its will-they-won’t-they tension between Brennan (Emily Deschanel, sister of New Girl’s Zooey) and Booth (David Boreanaz). Of course, we know they did, and now Brennan’s up the duff: we can only hope the baby isn’t a sign this show is flagging.
FRIDAY FEBRUARY 10
Doc Martin (TV1, 8.30pm). Martin Clunes, globe-trotting animal lover, is back as the medical curmudgeon, but this time, he’s sprogged up.